Thursday, May 28, 2020

Cat, peanut butter, and working from home

I just had to clean peanut butter off my desk, my carpet, and my cat. How is your morning going?


 

This is the early morning text I sent my family and friends this morning.



This is my "I forgive you" face

 

What happened:

 

I was logging into my computer, getting ready to start working for the day with my breakfast sitting on the desk next to my keyboard (toasted blueberry bagel slathered with peanut butter) when Toothless decided to jump onto my desk.

 

Right onto the bagel.

 

I grabbed him and, in the scramble, the plate and half of the bagel ended up peanut butter side down on the floor, the other half stayed on my desk with a perfect pawprint in the peanut butter.

 

I wasn’t quite sure what to do with Toothless. I didn’t want to set him down somewhere and risk him spreading the peanut butter all over my apartment so I locked both of us in the bathroom, put him in the sink, and turned on the water.

 

For somebody who is always so curious about the wet sink and enjoys standing in it after I wash my hands, he was hella not happy to be in it with the water running. He kept trying to escape while I was trying to clean out as much of the peanut butter as I could, using hot water in the hopes it would cut through the oil in the peanut butter while trying to not burn him or me.

 

Funny story: peanut butter doesn’t come out of long cat hair.

 

Halfway through this mess, I was wishing I had grabbed the Dawn out of the kitchen to help with the peanut butter removal but I didn’t trust Toothless to stay put if I left to go get it. Plus, I didn’t know if I could keep him still long enough to get the Dawn on him and then rinsed out. Having a pissed off cat is one thing, having a pissed off cat with a mouth full of dish soap is a completely different can of worms.

 

So, I got as much of the peanut butter off of him as I could, grabbed the bath towel I use for my hair because I couldn’t reach any others, and got him wrapped up in it. Toothless hates being burrito wrapped because it usually means he’s getting his nails trimmed so that was fun. Took him back out to the living room so I could sit with him in my lap as I finished toweling him off.

 

As soon as I let him go, he stood in the middle of the living room and did his version of yowling (he’s a very quiet cat so his yowling is the same as a normal cat’s standard volume meow), then retreated to the corner to start licking himself clean.

Scruffy tail from this morning's shenanigans

 

It was 45 minutes straight of listening to him groom across the room from me.

 

Forty. Five. Minutes. *eye twitch*

 

Then, he went in my room to continue the process, before coming back out to the living room to lick some more.

 

The cleaning process of this wasn’t over for me, either. I grabbed a bowl and filled it with hot water and Dawn, then scrubbed the peanut butter out of my carpet. Thankfully, it’s brown so it blends right in. Tossed the bagel (sad face), cleaned the peanut butter off my desk, and returned to work.

 

One of the bad things about the whole situation is that the bagel was still warm from the toaster and the peanut butter was in a near-liquid state so when Toothless landed on it, it splattered all over. I found a couple of drops on my computer monitor almost 2 feet away from the crime scene.

 

I ended up bleeding, Toothless ended up looking like a half-drowned rat, I had cereal for breakfast, Toothless got a bunch of peanut butter and a sink bath. His tail still looks terrible, but he’s napping in his cat tree and all is right with the world.

 

So how was your day?